women's ministry in the 21st century

I have a confession to make: when I hear the phrase, "women's ministry," I cringe. Immediately, images of doilies, cutesy teas, knitting, and flowery fonts on the cover of Bible workbooks parade in front of my eyes, ghosts from the small Baptist church in which I (almost literally) grew up. Many of the women I know have similar reactions. We suspect that "women's ministry" has nothing to offer those of us who, for example:

• don't have kids
• have kids AND a career
  
• dread arts and crafts
  
• don't believe that "submission" should be one-sided
  
• don't especially appreciate Beth Moore (or Elizabeth Eliot)
  
• are less emotional than the [stereo]typical woman
• didn't kiss dating goodbye
  

Don't get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for women who DO benefit from traditional women's ministry, and I realize that good, relevant women's ministries do exist - but I also know that stereotypes exist for a reason. I suspect that many women's ministries, particularly in smaller churches like mine, are not equipped to minister to those of us who don't fit the "church woman" mold, much less reach the majority of non-Christian women in our culture...

So what does "women's ministry" look like in the 21st century? How can churches meet the needs of ALL women, regardless of their vocation and place in life? I've been wrestling with questions like these lately as I have been taking stock of the overall needs and strengths of my congregation, in which there is no formal "women's ministry" in place.

After church this past Sunday, a man from the congregation mentioned that he and his wife were glad I am now full-time at the church, since they had just recently been discussing the need for more "women's ministry" at Redeemer. I bristled at this, of course, because that's probably one of the biggest pet peeves of most female seminary grads: being put into the "women's ministry" box when that's neither your passion nor specifically your calling. However, as I have had further conversations with the women at my church, I am beginning to see the need for and the value of "women's ministry," but women's ministry of a particular sort. Some heuristic thoughts:

• Young moms truly do need connections with other women in the congregation, and this takes some special intentionality. This doesn't necessarily mean that young moms should only get together with other moms, but for a single gal like me, it's good to remember that childcare is a must if these women are going to be able to come to church events.
• Women need encouragement to develop their giftings and talents, and to then use those giftings and talents in the church body.
• Younger women need the wisdom and encouragement of older women.
• Single women and married women need each other's perspectives on life.
• Even if a woman is well-educated and has a career, she still needs connections with other women in the congregation. She might also need opportunities to engage faith more intellectually, or on the flip-side to have a space in which she can allow her faith to engage and release her emotions.

In other words, women need discipleship. At the same time, it is only men and women together that bear the image of God -- what implications does that have for spiritual formation and discipleship? But that's a topic for another day...

So what shape SHOULD women's ministry take in the church today? I suppose asking questions is the first step toward finding answers...

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Case in point: After publishing this post, I visited a blog associated with the "True Woman" movement (hand-in-hand with the Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood), and the most recent posts include, "You can't go wrong with Chester's Chocolate Mint Brownies," "Studying Housework," "He Never Helps Out," and my personal favorite, "Warm Fuzzies."